Second chances

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No “Regerts”

Some of you may remember the TV commercial about someone getting a “ No Regrets” tattoo that was misspelled, leading to a permanent regret. Cambridge defines regret as “a feeling of sadness or wrong or about a mistake that you have made, and a wish that it could have been different and better.” Sound familiar? I imagine all of us at one time or another have experienced a regret or two sometime in our past.

As I am blessed to be in my 60s, I try not to have regrets. But perhaps I’m just fooling myself. I call them instead, What Ifs, things I could have done differently. Of those, there are plenty! Maybe you share some of them:

What if I’d have gone to a different high school?

What if I would have planned that date differently?

What if I’d have chosen a different career?

What if I’d have chosen a different spouse?

What if I’d have stopped before that last drink?

What if I would have worked harder to keep my family together?

What if I’d have bought that new Apple stock when it became public?

This list could be endless as you add your “ what ifs” to it. There is no denying that our choices, good and bad, alter the course of our lives. We may not have realized it at the moment, but when looking back, we can see those times when we zigged where we should have zagged. What do we do with this now? May I suggest three things we can do to utilize these to our benefit and to others.
First, don’t dwell on things you would have done differently, or imagine how your life would look now had you made different choices. Instead, be grateful for lessons learned and future opportunities to make decisions based on wisdom gained from your past.

Second, use your past “regerts” to help others you may encounter who might be facing similar decisions. There is nothing more effective in offering advice, than genuine “me too” moments. When helping someone through difficult situations, you are more credible when you can honestly share a time when you were facing the same decision.

Third, for us who follow Christ, understanding that all things truly do work out for our good if we love God and walk in his purpose for us. There is little more powerful or impactful than a messed up life due to bad choices that has been restored into a testimony of God’s goodness, regardless of a life of what if moments. He trades beauty for ashes every time. We may live within the realm of bad decisions, but God has a way of recalibrating us to his intended plan as if nothing happened. Our identity is not in bad decisions, but rather the wisdom gained in the process. No “regerts.”

Still, I wonder what would have happened if I took up golf earlier.

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Someone Died That I Might Live

I apologize to my followers for being absent these past few months. I’ve been on dialysis and it’s taken its toll on my creative juices. However I’m pleased to report that I’m recovering from a very successful kidney transplant, gifted to me on April 4th just before Easter. This has been a twenty year battle but God in his mercy answered my prayers.

I was not fortunate enough to have a live donor kidney available, so I had to go on a three-state waiting list for a cadaver kidney. You must understand the dilemma of praying for such an organ. For my prayers to be answered meant that someone had to first die to make that organ available to me. It is the unfortunate nature of the organ donor process. I began praying for the family of whoever this person would be long before I receive the call that a kidney was available. I don’t know the identity of this person or their family due to medical privacy laws, but I’m eternally grateful to this family. I owe them my life. It is now my duty to take full advantage of this new chance and live my life in such a manner as to honor this person’s precious life-saving gift so that it won’t be wasted.

It’s entirely appropriate that I received this gift on Easter week, a time when we celebrate someone else who died that we might live. Scripture says that only a few would ever die for someone else, but that while we were still in our sinful state, Christ died for us. His death and resurrection gave us a second chance to live eternally with a clean slate. Our old nature exists no longer and we are a new creation.

Just as I owe the family of my donor to live my life to the fullest, I owe Christ my all with each new day I’m given. Ephesians 4:1 says;

“Therefore I, as a prisoner for the Lord, beg you to lead a life worthy of your calling, for you have been called by God”

It’s easy as believers to become complacent in our faith, to lose our passion or first love. I’m sure I’ll have times yet to come when relaxing will be easier than serving. But having survived both cancer and end-stage renal failure, I hold precious and dear every new day God grants me. I want nothing less than to honor this opportunity to live my remaining years in his service, wherever that leads me.

A persons death gave new life to my physical body. Christ’s death gave new and eternal life to my spiritual body. I will not squander either opportunity. God bless you all.